Date: Sat, 3 Oct 1998 02:11:05 -0400 (EDT) To: The Cheshire Catalyst Subject: Product Warning Labels These are actual warning labels on products: ON TESCO'S TIRIMISU DESSERT - Do not turn upside down. (printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING - Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON - Do not iron clothes on body. ON CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE - Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID) - Warning: may cause drowsiness. ON A KITCHEN KNIFE - Warning: keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHRISTMAS LIGHTS - For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A FOOD PROCESSOR - Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS - Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS - Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A CHAINSAW - Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. ON A HAIRDRYER - Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS - You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP - Directions: Use like regular soap. ON A FROZEN DINNER - Serving suggestion: Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX - fits one head.